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“All I can ever find online is how to leave a sociopath. I want one back. The challenge and all the sex is just too much fun to get over.”

Tweet by M.E. Thomas

I have read a great many articles about the dangerous nature of psychopaths (I have written previously on why technically there is no difference between psychopaths and sociopaths) and how they wreck relationships.  Yet a central theme that runs through these articles is that one of the major things that keep the alleged victim in a relationship is the sex.  It seems there is a consensus that psychopaths are very good at that aspect of life – but why?

I would speculate that there are three traits that psychopaths share that enable them to transcend the average in regards to sex and these are:

  • Psychopaths feel absolutely no mental connection to the norms of society. This feature allows the man or woman to be far less constrained than most people, more experimental and unafraid to try new things. One can easily see that psychopaths are willing to break boundaries and give their partner (s) a thrill ride that most people would feel was, well, improper.  And while a partner might protest at first, and feel guilt and contempt after a relationship has ended, while it is taking place they are in an adrenaline rush of a lifetime.
  • Psychopaths feel no guilt. They can feel disappointment over not achieving a goal, or losing, but not the personal pain and anguish of guilt. Most people who have problems with sex within a relationship have been taught what is proper when growing up (i.e. nudity is wrong) and all these intimacy-killers prevent them from being able to be fully open with their partner.  The psychopath has no such inhibitions, and even though they may actually be quite loyal to their partner, they will do their best to introduce them to a new world of infinite possibilities.
  • Psychopaths get bored easily. That can be dangerous to a relationship as many psychopaths can lose interest and end up dumping a partner merely due to not getting a high anymore.  Yet if the psychopath is loyal to their partner (maybe due to their religious ideals) they will seek to spark things up and seek out new experiences. Again, hang on for the ride.

That all being said I am neither endorsing nor condemning getting involved with a psychopath.  After all, as anyone who has read my book, “Freedom from Conscience – Melanie’s Awakening” the main character abandons her self-imposed puritanical sexuality and embarks on a series of extremely complicated relationships – with possibly some dark consequences for at least one companion – yet everyone she is involved with find her intoxicating and addicting. And in the surprise ending she creates her ideal relationship on her terms, nobody else really matters. One can benefit if they accept her and find happiness… yet everything is based on what her final lover is willing to accept.

This ultimately is the price of being with a psychopath.  Psychopaths do indeed feel love, if they choose to, and they can be quite loyal…again, if they choose to, and on their terms. It all depends ultimately on what they see as their ideal life goal. However, while some people with psychopathic personality desire to be in a long-term romance and raise a family, one that might of course be their greatest personal glory, they will not bring empathy to the table; although one may have to ask, is empathy necessary for love to exist?